Haunted Fire Studio :: Benjamin Hall :: Illustrator and Comic Book Artist

They've been repairing the cable wires on the telephone pole outside my house for the past month or so... what was once an intermittent connection to the web has now been completely dead for over a week. Time Warner Cable has no idea when this will be finished or when our home will be blessed with the internets again.

I continue to work and maybe one day I'll blog again from the comfort of my own damn house.

Maybe....

Bitterness brought to you by the fine folks at Time Warner Cable... the only cable game in town. :(

Meet Kendall.  She is one of the characters in the newest project I have taken on.  I'm not going to talk about the project until we have a publisher lined up... I think I've finally learned my lesson on that... But I think everyone will enjoy it if it ever comes out.

Things are good for me right now, I think I've got a good handle on my new Wacom and how to use it and hopefully will start to wrap up some the projects I've been blabbing about like Knucklejelly and Filthy Habit.

This weekend the local comic shop I managed and spent most of my young life at is closing down and moving to a different location, and while the store is doing fine and it's merchandise will all be moved to a nicer store front to live on forever, the building that holds all of my memories will be sadly left behind. I was talking with my friend Chris about the good times we had in that store and he came up with the idea of us making lists of the top ten most memorable things that happened.

I apologize in advance if there are duplicates.

10. Little Ben

When I was a young man and just getting into comics in the late 80's, I had a lot of catching up to do on all the comics I had missed from the previous decades. I was well versed and up to date on my TMNT, Real Ghostbusters and Transformers comics, but the superhero comics of yesteryear seemed endless in their volume. My earliest memories of this comic shop are of having my Mom drop me off and leave me at the store for hours so I could go through the back issues and teach myself the history of comics. Every time I thought I had seen everything in the store I would find a hidden box of magazines or a box of quarter comics I had not seen before. The inventory was overwhelming and I was not satisfied until I had seen it all. It was a comics Valhalla. (This actually happened at the VERY first store location. The one I worked at was the second location of this same store, but I thought I'd include it because these memories of rummaging through back-issues all day and annoying the employees are what made me love comics so much and eventually want to work there.)

9. All Night Porno Party

When I first started working there, my future buddy Chris was the manager. Chris was organizing a birthday party for another manager in the chain named Jeff. Jeff's birthday party consisted of dinner, drinks (for those of us of age) and a visit to the porno store. We were actually looking to rent Peter Jackson's cult adult Muppet tale "Meet The Feebles" and had been told we should try checking out a video rental place call "New Fine Arts" that carried odd movie like this. This info turned out to be dubious as we drove all the way out to Dallas to learn, once we were in the store, that all they carried was porn. This was the first time many of us had been in such an establishment and after we were done giggling at the wall of whips and dildos, Chris decided he had to buy Jeff some birthday porn. This particular store had just recently had a in-store signing by porn star Chasey Lain and had a discount bin of her videos set up, which Jeff made his choice from. It was then decided that we all HAD to watch this thing. Understand this was way before the Internet was an easily accessible 24 hour porn portal and you could have counted the number of completely nude women we had all seen most likely on one hand. The only problem with this plan was many of us were still living at home and the only place with a vcr/tv combo and relative privacy was the store which we had closed down for the night. So we went back after hours ordered some pizza and the group of us (I think there was actually a couple of girls with us... I remember becoming very embarrassed) sat and watched a porn from beginning to end while leaning up against the high dollar comic lock box. It's was a lot of fun at first... but once we ran out of vagina and penis jokes, it dwindled down into lots of fast forwarding, clearing of throats and a hilariously awkward tension in the air before we finally went home.

8. Stalker Girls

For whatever reason, guys working at funny book stores will always have at least one stalker girl customer. I even had a few stalker men... which was weird, but we are talking about good times here so I will share a story about my buddy Pat.

Pat was alone in the store and had a young girl who was trying to get his attention by flitting around the behind him as he did his best to ignore her and stock the comic shelves. Apparently she thought the best display of her beauty was to dance around like a fairy princess or ballerina. When she finally left and we returned from lunch, Pat informed us of what had been going on and we all went to the security tapes to catch this mating dance in action. To all of our great amusement, during one of her twirls, she lost her balance and completely ate shit in the comic aisle, quickly checking to see if Pat noticed her crash (he did not) she picked herself up and resumed her pixie dance. This became even funnier when frequently rewound.

7. Sewer Water

Let nothing come between the customer and the product.

One hot summer day, the plumbing in the walls between us and the shop next door backed up and began flooding out into the floor, soaking the carpet with the foulest smelling sewer water you could ever imagine. The entire store stank, but it was manly concentrated in the 12 foot of wet carpet just under our display of lead miniature battle figurines. Most of our customers fled the store in disgust as I wanted to do, but not all of them. Some valiant soles tried to stretch across the soiled area, braving the foul stench in order to complete their elf army... and some, to my amazement, just stood right in the middle of it as though nothing was different at all! It was all I could do to keep from screaming at them, "That's fucking shit water! YOU'RE STANDING IN SHIT WATER!!!"

6. Sam Jackson Drinks Pee

One of the many great things about having a fun crew work at the store is you attract a crowd of regulars that become more than customers. One of these regulars was a man named Sam Jackson. Sam is a great guy and was the elder statesman of our group because he had a family and was a bit older than us. Sam got in a large special order at the store and to just have a laugh, Pat scribbled in Sharpie marker "Sam drinks pee." in large letters on the side of the plain cardboard box it shipped in. Sam laughed when he saw it and took the box home with him paying it no further mind. Later that year at Christmas with his wife's family, his holiday eggnog was ruined by the screams of his nephews repeating "Sam drinks pee!" Sam's wife had unknowingly used the same box for Christmas gifts, causing him to spend the rest of the his holiday trying to explain to his family that he did not, in fact, drink pee.

5. The Finger Trap

We had a clear plastic display box of trading cards with a flip front/top on it for accessing the cards. When the flip top was open, the hinge left just enough space for you to fit your fingers in. Chris was behind the counter playing with the flip top while talking to Sam, who was in front of the counter. Chris's fingers slipped into the space the hinge left open and then he accidentally dropped the flip top, pinching his fingers in the hinge. Trying not to let Sam know he was stuck, Chris searched with his free fingers for something to grab on to, but the box was too wide. He was completely imprisoned but continued his conversation with Sam as if nothing was happening. Sam went on gabbing with Chris, pretending not to notice his swollen digits until Chris started to turn red in the face. He finally asked, "Do you want some help with that?" to which Chris whimpered, "Yes please"

4. Child Endangerment

Every once and a while a kid is gonna get hurt.

One year yo-yo's were really hot and the owner of the store wanted all the employees to learn how to yo-yo so we could teach the kids that bought them. This command was also followed with the decree that employees should be yo-yoing when walking around the store to show how fun it was. I had just graduated to a solid wood yo-yo with no extra springs or gizmos to help it work and was pretty proud of my limited yo-yo skills. A man, who had come in with his son, was leaving out the door in front of me and called for his boy to join him, who was standing somewhere behind me, as I thrust my wooden yo-yo up and down while standing in the middle of the aisle. The boy quickly stopped what he was doing and ran to join his father running right under my hand as I unknowingly released my solid wooden yo-yo smack on the top of his head. There was a hollow THUNK and then a surprised look from the boy, who was now halfway to his Dad, when he turned around, rubbing his noggin, wondering what the hell just happened.

3. Tits in the Comics

This happened before my time, but was too funny to let slide. I don't even know the poor girl's name only the legend of her. Apparently she was short in stature, but well endowed in the chest area.

We had a large lock box in the store in which we kept all the high dollar funny books. It had a large plastic lid that swung open like a coffin lid and when someone wanted something out of it, you had to stand there like a moron, holding the lid up, as they shuffled through the books. The box came up somewhere around my waist and just below this woman's breasts. In fact, when the box was open she had to lay her boobs on the comics in order for her arm to be long enough to hold the lid up, much to the delight of our silver age customers. One day, the lid slipped out of her hand and slammed down on her mammaries with a horrendous WHACK, creating an uncomfortable comics/tits sandwich and leaving an angry red welt across her visible cleavage. Ouch.

2. My Circle of Friends

The number two most memorable thing that happened there was of course meeting all the people who shopped and worked there, most of whom I still talk to today. I worked at that store for nearly 5 years and it had a profound effect on my social development and the sort of folks who I hang out with today... most of whom are from that store.... in fact, pretty much ALL my friends are from that store somehow.

1. Marlena

That's right, that same damn store is where I met my beautiful wife and the mother of my child, Marlena. I try not to delve into our personal life too much on this blog, but when she first walked in that door looking for an application, I was immediately hooked. I knew she was the one.... and almost 9 years later I'm just as enamored with her as I was then, if not more so.

So thanks comic shop. Seriously.

I will dearly miss you.

Labels: updates

How was your Free Comic Book day?  Was it good?  Did you enjoy your Free Comics?

I didn't....

I didn't do anything this year because I have all too many projects in the works and nothing with a definite publishing time.  No artbooks, nothing to pimp, no reason to leave the house.  It was my first time to not attend CAPE!, Zues Comics' Free Comic Book Day event

I did however go to meet my partner-in-crime, Dave Justus, for dinner as he had driven all the way up from Austin to attend CAPE!  I did not realize the dinner he was going to was an after party to thank the folks that participated in CAPE...  Of which, I did not this year.  So I was a little embarassed to be there and felt a bit like an interloper.  I did not partake in any of the free food to punish myself for this crime.

It was really good for me though.  Having my baby boy slowed down alot of stuff that was in the works for me, so getting to see old friends and meet some amazing professionals was really fun.

Excuse me while I name drop....

I got to meet, and hang out with Matt Sturges, Tony Bedard, Paul Benjamin, Paul Maybury, Kristian Donaldson and Chad Thomas.

I was really fun!

For some reason, my other buddy, who was supposed to hang out, completely ditched.

That's right Thomas P. Reidy III... I'm looking at you!

Labels: updates

Genre-xplosion is a short, spoiler free introduction to some of the strange and obscure movies and comics that I enjoy. Some of them are brilliant masterpieces... some of them aren't. All of them are entertaining.
SET-UP:
Capt. John Boyd (Guy Pearce) is transferred to Fort Spenser, a place for unwanted misfits in the military, during the Mexican-American War. Soon after his arrival, the inhabitants of the fort find a man (Robert Carlyle) outside in the snow who has come to the them for help. His traveling party has been trapped in cave for three months with no food and their guide, the heinous Col. Ives, has begun murdering members of the party and eating them. Several members from Fort Spenser travel to the cave to rescue any survivors and deal with Ives, whom the local Indian believes has become a Wendigo, a man who eats the flesh of another man and gains his strengths, steals his spirit and becomes insatiable.
SEX AND VIOLENCE:
There is very little nudity in this film besides a quick shot of naked man rump. On the contrast there are copious amounts of blood, bone and guts, all of which are handled in a very realistic manner and not played up for exploitive reasons.


THOUGHTS:

Labels: genre-xplosion

Here is the final version of the movie poster I did for my Buddy Barak Epstein's newest film Blood on the Highway

This weekend I had one of my all time geek fantasies come to life. I got to meet most of the cast of my favorite TV show, Mystery Science Theater 3000! They came to town touring under the guise of a 20 year reunion and performing as their new group Cinematic Titanic at this years USA Film Festival. It was a night I will remember for the rest of my life.
From right to left Josh Weinstein, Trace Beaulieu, Mary Jo Pehl, Joel Hodgson, Frank Coniff, and "RAD" Mary Jo's husband. Click here for a larger photo.

Whenever you meet someone you've idolized for most of your life you get hit with two separate feelings:

Holy Crap this can't be real, there he/she is!!! In the flesh!

and

Man, I hope he/she is not a douche in real life...

Luckily everyone who was involved with the Satellite of Love was a genuinely nice person and really, really off-the-cuff funny. I was a little disappointed to learn they all are in fact human and there were apparently some quarrels and bumping of heads behind the scenes, that they were all too gracious to talk about while the show was still airing, but I appreciated their candor. This is apparently what led to so many changes in the cast over the years starting with Josh Weinstien in season one. During the panel, we learned why each of them eventually left the show, except for Trace who joked he was fired at one point. Only Frank Coniff left to pursue other things. Fortunately, all of the group that appeared at the Film Festival seemed to really get along and enjoy each others company.

The night started with a Q and A panel in which the audience asked the cast a number of dumb questions, which somehow always resulting in revealing and entertaining answers. Even though I had a million questions, I couldn't come up with just one. Once I had one question answered, I would not have been satisfied until I had all of my questions answered... preferably over dinner and drinks, but since that was not going to happen, I sat back and watched in glee as the icons of my youth returned questions like "which was a worse movie this or that" or interesting, but unrefined questions in which the subject of the question had to be discussed at length before an answer could be made. One goob even had the cojones to stand up and accuse them of stealing a skit he sent them on video. They quickly reduced the man to a spineless puddle of goo like a pack of highly trained ninja let loose on a doddering old man. It was hilariously awkward.

I'm am always amazed at my fellow geek's inability to operate in a public setting. This activity was brought up again when we filed out of the theater after the Q and A to let them clean up, and then piled back in to enjoy a live performance of them riffing on the Roger Corman classic "The Wasp Woman". We enjoyed our original seats, having gotten there an hour early just to secure them, and wanted to return to the same seats for the movie. So instead of going to the bathroom or getting something to eat, we got right back in line, damning our aching bladders. When we were let back into the theater, the people in front of us took our old seats... no big deal, the other side of our aisle was still open so we quickly grabbed seats over there. When I sat down I noticed a small paperback novel someone had left behind and sat next to it. I did not realize that that one paperback was a beacon to any newcomers that the ENTIRE ROW OF SEATS was saved until we were verbally accosted by a group of nerds who accused us of stealing their place. When we apologized, and tried to explain that we tried to return to our original seats but they were taken so we sat in the next available chairs, their nerdish eyes glowed white hot with the fires of Mordor. They argued with us for a while (actually thinking we would move), cursed us in what may have been Klingon, begrudgingly took back their novel and found seats elsewhere in the quickly filling up theater. After the show, having finally gotten over their immature indignation, one of them finally apologized to us by telling us he hoped we enjoyed the seats and kindly waving both his middle fingers at us as he stomped to the restroom.

We, of course, did enjoy the seats... thank you kind sir.

As far as the actual show went, watching them perform live with a large audience was more enjoyable than any tv show that ever aired. I kept having to remind myself that they were doing this live and were actually in the theater with us. The audience howled and cackled at every single joke. Every... Single... One. And I felt like I was twelve again, laying on my belly in my parents front room as my whole family howled and cackled at Joel and the bots and the retched movie Dr. Forrester and Tv's Frank had forced them to watch.

It's was an amazing night.

The one and only down side of the event was the hilarious Kevin Murphy, who was scheduled to appear, canceled due to sickness. I've would have really enjoyed to see him, Mike Nelson and Bill Corbett as well (who were not scheduled to appear but have formed the equally hilarious Riff Trax ), but I count myself lucky I got to see as many of my favorite actors as I did. Afterwards, the cast shook hands and signed autographs out in the hallway. I stupidly didn't bring anything to sign, nor did I go talk to them. Instead I snuck a few photos and slunk back into the night with my memories. In my mind these people are legends... and you just don't meet legends.

Labels: updates